It's hard to swallow

It came today. It's been hard everyday but today it's been hard to hold back the tears and I haven't even really cried yet. It's not so much hard to swallow but my heart feels so heavy. I want to hold her close and hug her tightly and tell her I'm scared too but I know she's going to be alright. I've never had to be this strong. I have always broken down and cried. Why doesn't it feel right to that this time? I guess it's her time to be fragile and breakdown and I want to be there for her. How hard it must be for others that love her too. The sons far away, the husband who sees her everyday and the sister that just lost her mom last year. It's hard on everyone, but she's mine. I need her. Please God, take care of her. Please.....